How To Strengthen Your Boundaries
When we are struggling in our love and relationships, it is easy to fall into the trap of giving up on ourselves. If we´ve had a pattern of sabotaging our relationships, it´s way too easy to give in to the critical voice inside us, the voice that is telling us we do all wrong and that we should or shouldn´t do this or that.
This voice will tell us to go in the wrong direction, because it will want us to go into our masculine energy.
So when a man - or our man - suddenly shows up, by providing us some kind of loving, some kind of attention, or some kind of reaching out, we get all absorbed and want to GIVE BACK as much as we possibly can, in order to not “loose” him again.
I have been there so many times, and I know that GIVING TO GET is not working!
The problem when a woman starts giving back, from a place of general lack, is that we so easily “over-do” and slip into giving up on ourselves instead. It´s like he is giving us the pinkie, but we don´t only try to take his whole hand - we also give away both our hands!
And by that I mean, we get so eager to connect, so absorbed by the little love that is offered to us, that we totally forget our own boundaries.
I have already talked a lot about the difference between “inner boundaries” and “framework boundaries”. What tends to happen when we give up on ourselves in order to please a man, is that we ignore our inner boundaries AND also our framework boundaries, because inside we feel so small, starved and desperate for a little bit of something, that only has maybe a tiny bit of potential…
Our vision gets blurred and even though our inner voice is TRYING to reach out to us, and trying to tell us to at least slow down before we go ahead and do the things that we later may regret or will push him away - we just cannot listen to this little voice.
SO. If this is happening to you, perhaps now, perhaps happens often or has happened…I want you to know that it CAN BE FIXED.
In my Live Boundaries Masterclass, you learn what boundaries really are, how you can use your feminine energy to become more in tune with your boundaries, and how to set strong and firm boundaries with men.
Fill in the form below to receive more information!
Especially if you are prone to giving up on yourself and your own needs, Self-care is an important key to love, compassion and boundaries setting.
Feminine energy is about being. It's about letting ourselves slowly and organically transform back into the love that we ultimately exist up.
When we are in our masculine, hyper functioning and wanting to give to your man in the hopes of getting something - just anything - back, then it becomes very hard to hear that inner voice which wants us to listen and stop ourselves when we start giving up on ourselves.
We stop feeling our needs. We stop listening to our bodies and what they are telling us.
And as we disconnect from our bodies we also disconnect from our hearts. And love is a heart based emotion.
Sometimes when we are intoxicated by chemistry we feel for a man, we believe that we are in love. When the reality is that unless we can feel at least a little bit of love for some parts of ourselves then it is almost impossible to feel real love for another.
So the first thing to do if you find yourself in a situation where you don´t trust yourself, you easily give in to temptations, you easily forget yourself, is to take care of YOU.
For me self-care is to get in touch with my own heart and my own feminine self. Regardless of how often it happens, when it happened or if it has just happened, that you gave up on yourself - the answer to the distress you are feeling and the first step in building new, stronger boundaries is to take care of yourself.
Self-care is to treat yourself in a way that will manifest how you want others to treat you.
So take a look at yourself right now .In what way are you not taking care of yourself? How often does this happen?
Do you neglect yourself in one way or another?
Do you listen to your body and what it’s telling you?
I know several women who work so hard, they don’t even allow themselves to go to the ladies when needed…this is a terrible way of ignoring ourselves and our needs.
Are you listening to your heart and the voice inside?
Do you hear it or have you ignored it for so long that it’s given up?
A really solid Feminine Energy based self-care practice is a wonderful way to start attracting more love into your life. It is a wonderful way to build new pathways in your brain, which will help you feel more abundant. It is a wonderful way of getting to know your REAL, TRUE inner boundaries.
If you feel at all inspired by this work, and want to develop a solid foundation of Feminine Energy Boundaries - don´t hesitate, but contact me now. The Boundaries Masterclass can be your next step on your journey.